The Lazy Squirrel

by Russell on November 29, 2011

Since I moved into my winter lodgings, there has been a single squirrel making the rounds each day, stopping to check if the new resident has made a donation to the squirrel benevolent fund. After a few days I caved, and began putting a few nuts out on the snow-covered deck, then sat back to watch the trail of tiny foot prints in the snow as my panhandling friend accepted my meager donation.
All was good until I changed it up a bit and offered some pistachios. The squirrel inspected each and everyone, and rejected them. Too hard. Too much work to strip the shells. Sometime later, I shelled them and left a few outside. Half of them vanished as labor tax. Sure enough, they were all gone an hour later.

It got me to thinking how that squirrel represented a metaphor of modern society.
Now don’t get me wrong here. I’m not saying that everyone who lives off handouts is a deadbeat, but some most definitely are. I’ve seen them, out there asking for money.
The signs say … no food, nowhere to live and my personal favourite … will work for food. I’ll come back to that.

Many of them sit there begging in a haze of cigarette smoke, while next to them is their overfed dog. They always seem to smoke tailor mades (packet cigarettes), the most expensive way to smoke. If it’s that tough for you, and you can’t buy food, stop smoking and get rid of the fat dog.

Now … work for food … I’ve heard stories first hand of people offered work.
What sort of work?
Cutting some firewood.
Na. Too hard. I can earn more standing here begging.
Excuse me.

Some people expect everything in their lives be given to them. No hard work, no effort. I deserve it. I hear stories of school kids who think mummy and daddy owe them a flash car because they finished college. Get it ya self ya little shit. Why?

You’re just like that damn lazy squirrel. You’ve had it too good for too long.

{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

Forest Gloomwood June 18, 2012 at 10:22 am

Well written, Russell, However, I think you fail to recognize that humans are more likely to pity the dog than the person. The pan-handler knows this and the dog actually increases the amount of money people will give him/her.
The fact that people care more for the dog’s well being than that of its human owner surprises me and makes me contemplate the selfishness of the human race as a whole.
Furthermore, the homeless person who is asking for a handout generally tends to be someone who is broken: uneducated, unskilled and with a DSM4 code (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, volume 4). On their best day, they cannot hold a candle to someone like yourself who has an abundance of talent and motivation. Show some kindness, Russell, or at least some understanding.


Tina November 30, 2011 at 7:46 pm

I suppose panhandlers come in every size, shape and species.


graham November 30, 2011 at 4:29 pm

Money can’t buy you happiness …. But it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery

– Spike Milligan


Cynthia November 29, 2011 at 10:08 pm

Well said, Russell. Well, said.


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